Do You Feel Guilty? Ask Yourself Why

How many times have you felt guilty? Surely more than you would like. They have taught us to feel guilty when, in fact, sometimes we are not.

Remember that time when you refused to do something you didn’t want to do. The people who expected you to accept got mad at you, just because you didn’t do what they wanted.

Also think about the time when you said what you thought and everyone looked at you in disgust. The fact that no one agreed with your point of view made you feel guilty.

There are many situations in which we experience this feeling, but why? Sometimes, because it arises through the fear of rejection, by the continuous search for the approval of others.

Why do you feel guilty?

To free ourselves from a feeling as toxic as guilt, it is necessary that we look for the origin and the reasons for it.

With this clear objective, we will go step by step to analyze the situation and be able to get rid of this terrible feeling that, sometimes, we should not feel.

Look for the causes of guilt

Imagine that you feel very guilty for saying what you think, something that should not happen. The first thing you should do is find the reason why you feel this way.

You may find that when you were younger they laughed at you every time you said what was on your mind. Maybe your parents didn’t pay attention to what you were saying and called it nonsense.

Don’t shirk your responsibility

If you have been guilty that this project has not been able to continue forward, if you are the cause of your best friend’s anger, it is time to take responsibility.

To do this, we know that we cannot change the past, but we can change the future. It is time to stop feeling guilty and do nothing about it.

Go ahead and, with facts, change the situation you have caused.

Forgive yourself

Perhaps the hardest part is forgiving ourselves. We are not perfect, we make mistakes and we have to accept this as something natural.

One technique that can help us is to imagine that we have a child within us. Imagine that you feel guilty about something you have done or said. What would you say to him?

Don’t reject your feelings

Something we do without realizing it is reject the negative feelings and emotions that come to us.

What you probably did not know is that preventing them from dating will not make you feel better, quite the opposite.

Learn to accept your most negative feelings. Allow yourself to express them. You will see how this will allow you to vent and clarify your ideas.

Do you still feel as guilty as before?

Change the course of things

Once you have done all the previous steps and accepted the fact that you cannot change what has already happened, it is time to change the course of things.

With actions, with words, you can redirect everything that has made you feel so bad.

Now you have accepted your mistake, you have forgiven yourself, so it is time for you to move on. Things are not solved by asking for forgiveness, but by forgiving yourself and showing repentance with actions.

Despite all this, there will be many times when you will stay in the first of the steps. Because saying “no” shouldn’t make you feel guilty, be faithful to your values, or tell the truth even if it hurts.

It is not the first time that we find ourselves pretending so that the other person does not feel bad about what we think.

However, by doing this we are limiting ourselves, putting up barriers and causing us to feel terribly guilty at the least.

Learn to be assertive, and if at any point you really screw up, accept it and move on. Don’t let guilt catch you. This is not the function of this feeling. With him you will realize that you are not perfect and you will know that the word “sorry” has to be earned.